If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster

And treat those two impostors just the same...

Yours is the world and everything that's in it...

— excerpts from the poem, "If", by Rudyard Kipling

The first thing to remember and accept is that the sense of frustration and even anger you might be feeling is normal. The situation is unprecedented, and it would not be reasonable to expect calm acceptance. Once you accept that these are OK feelings to have, instead of being caught up in these emotions, you can start to plan how you will cope. If you are struggling with this, reach out—first to trusted friends and then to a professional, if needed. Online psychological support is very effective—no laying on of hands needed!

The base is made up of certainties—that is, the things we have been able to put into the boxes and are confident we have in place—which are managed or manageable, or are irrelevant to us. The more uncertainties we still have in life—which we perceive as relevant—the more stretched our resources in juggling the balls we have not yet found boxes for.

One of the most popular battles for armchair divers and Internet warriors is that of training versus experience. You hear it all the time: “I don't need a certification card for that dive. I've been doing dives like that for years.”

The other popular assertion is that all those pioneers in diving got it all through experience: “No one was doing certification cards back then, and if it was good enough for them, well, then it is surely good enough for me!”

Finally, you hear the counter argument: “Yes, they may have all the badges, but I wouldn't dive with them.”

Ego simply refers to self and how we feel about ourselves. This results in our thoughts, emotions and behaviour. Where an ego is arrogant, overbearing, misguided or delusional, then bad things can and often do happen. However, having a big ego is not, without a skewed view as above, going to cause any problems—in fact, quite the opposite. Let me explain.

Recently, while working my day job, I was at Heathrow Airport in London for three days to work with a group of very talented executives who ran a successful multinational company. My role was to enhance conversations, guide and challenge participants on strategy development and to get the board of directors working as a cohesive team on issues that challenged both themselves and the company.

Over the years, I have had the privilege of being involved in some fantastic teams, sometimes in a leadership role, sometimes as an advisor helping to form a great team, and in others, as a team member. These teams have been engaged in pursuing objectives in sport, from international rugby to motorcycle racing and rally driving, through to high-performing teams in business. Over the last few years, I have enjoyed being part of dive teams, particularly in technical diving.

But let's look at this seriously for a minute. Why do these things appeal to us? Why do we like to be recognised and to have a group identity? Well, we could fall back on the “that-is-human-nature” argument, and certainly, there are cogent points to be made for this idea. We could argue that it is down to our socialisation; it is considered the norm to be part of a social group with the same values and aspirations.

Surprisingly perhaps it is not the most talented that always succeed. In fact, an abundance of talent can actually work against the potential success as insufficient drive and effort is needed and thereby applied to realise a good level of success. When the last three percent is needed and its drive and commitment that will get them there, the highly talented are often found lacking to make the final step to the top of the tree.

A good few years ago, I was a newly minted sports psychologist. I had done three years of supervised experience, after getting my graduate degree, and was looking to get involved in a practice as soon as possible, applying all that knowledge and theory I had been acquired. One of my first roles was working with a motorcycle racing team, a very interesting setup. I was working with youngsters, from 13 and 14 years of age, up to senior riders, all of whom were connected through the manufacturer’s team.